Are You Gay & Masculine Or Just Avoiding The Feminine Stereotype

To many gay dudes make being gay all that they are about. My sexuality doesn’t have to be everything that I’m about. I don’t think it’s self hate to not want to be thought of as a “typical” or stereotypical gay dude. Like ok you’re gay is that all?

That was a response from {one individual} on one of my post on Tumblr when discussing feminine gay men. Let more debate on this MASC vs FEM war began, smh. 

Sadly, this could very well the mentality of many masculine men in the gay community. Purely believing that feminine men center their life around homosexuality because they are they way they're is completely unfair. Its no more true than stating that just because a women is a women that her WHOLE life is centered around that. I am black, everything about me isn't about my race. I am a male everything about me isn't about my gender and so on.   

I expressed that I belief this homophobia [because that IS what it is] towards feminine men within the gay community is self-hate. 

This was my response:

Maybe their not thinking about being “typical” because too busy just being them. The assumption that because their flamboyant does not every imply their whole is based on that. That’s the same thing we also do as blacks, we police ourselves because we’re so fearful of being look at as the stereotype of blacks and then we put that onto other blacks, Its to the point were I have to have ask, as a masc GAY man, are you that because that’s natural to you…because that’s your personality…is it because you’re just being true to self…or is it ONLY because you masculinized [dont think thats a word, it is now lmao] yourself because you’re ashamed of being look at as “stereotypical.” And you want to avoid it so much that you're purposely making yourself exra "macho."

My philosophy is, stereotypes come from SOMEWHERE…it comes from a bit of truth, the problem is when its sold as the WHOLE truth, but nevertheless…people forget, there are feminine gay who not trying to be the stereotype, they are just  being true to SELF. There were feminine gay men before there was the stereotype. So its not like that’s what they are purposely tryning be.

See and that’s the great thing about being GAY. Is that there is no limit to masculinity. Because as a straight man, there are certain things  that man cannot do or it would be considered GAY….but if you’re already GAY…why put a LIMIT on yourself out of fear of being seen as a “typical” gay.

That’s why It say its self-hate…but deep down, theres something that still makes you feel ASHAMED that you policing yourself so that you won’t be “TOO GAY.” Like….WWWHY?!

Why DOES the gay community resent feminine men so harshly?